Self-Care: Beyond the Massage - Part II

I used to think no one liked me and valued me enough to include me in activities. Even when they did, I would think, “Oh they’re just being nice.”

Why do I share this with you?

Because this was the fear I had to first recognize, and then release, so I could do my own self-care that went “beyond the massage.”

The question I asked in last week’s message was, “Does full and complete self-care include more than massage, pedicures and other relaxing activities?”

More specifically, I asked, “Is it valuable and complete self-care when you….”:

• Allow your thoughts to be filled with fear, guilt & self-doubt?

• Ignore or rationalize your awareness around an issue?

• Fail to exercise your gifts and talents?

• Resist asking for and receiving help?

• Deflect praise, appreciation, and recognition?

So, today, a new question.

Why do so many people struggle to engage in positive thoughts about self, honest awareness of issues, exercising gifts and talents, etc.?

One reason is fear.

The thing about fear is it can be sneaky and hidden. The reasons we feel fear around something is often buried below layers of other thoughts and vulnerabilities.

If you want to manage your fear, you must first understand the reason behind it. And if you want to understand the reason, you must dig deep and listen to what it’s telling you.

For myself, I had to ask, “Why don’t I think people like me?” “Where does that come from for me?”

And, I had to ask, “Is it true?”

Because only when I asked, “Is it true?” was I able to see that actually, no; it wasn’t the truth.

I had to begin to think differently. And when I did, I could start to put the other deeper, more meaningful self-care pieces in place.

It’s only when you know what your fear is about that you can begin to implement strategies to shift your mindset. It’s this shift that will catapult your life in a new direction.

I still wouldn’t be some people’s first choice to hang out with or include in activities. I’m OK with that.

Because I am a definite first choice for others.