Self-Care: Beyond the Massage - Part IV

With forecasts for sunshine and warm temperatures this past weekend, my husband and I took the opportunity go to one of our favorite places to hike and bike. (Ohiopyle in case you’re wondering!)

As we approached an intersection where we make a left turn, I noted in my peripheral vision that he turned on his right turn signal. “Oh I must be wrong” I thought to myself; “He must have turned on the left signal.” Except I wasn’t wrong; something I realized as he turned right into a gas station.

An important key to understanding awareness of self and of others is that we take in information through all five of our senses. As we do, we interpret that information to form thoughts and associated emotions.

In our drive to Ohiopyle, I noticed my husband’s hand movement. But that movement didn’t align with what I thought “should” be happening. I created the thought, “I must be wrong.” In other words, I doubted what I knew to be true. Not a big deal – it was just a stop for fuel.

But what happens when we doubt ourselves around bigger things?

Like when you want to believe the words someone says but your inner knowing stirs that, “Something is off.” Your awareness of things like body language, intonation, eye gaze, vocal pace all warn you, “The words I’m hearing aren’t truth.”

But you doubt yourself and your awareness and wonder things like, “Am I really perceiving this correctly,” “Am I being overly sensitive,” or “Am I over-reacting?”

When you’re filled with self-doubt and question your own perception of a situation, you find yourself avoiding things like:

• Asking questions

• Holding someone accountable to their promises

• Expressing your concerns

One aspect of complete self-care (i.e., self-care that goes “beyond the massage”) is acting on your own awareness around an issue. In order to do so, you must be willing to trust your awareness and communicate it openly, honestly, and authentically.

You must be willing to overcome your self-doubt.

I laughed when I realized Rick was turning into the gas station. It was easy to do in the situation. I then told him the story of my thought process around the turn signal which led to an interesting conversation about how as humans, we have been given a gift of perception.

Listen to the message of the gift.

It’s there to guide you.