Gratitude in Difficult Circumstances
A few years ago, I read a great book titled, Resisting Happiness by Matthew Kelly. The book was gifted to me by one of my clients. I read it twice. Highlights and underlines; notes in the margins; and journaling adequately sum up my experience with this book. I found it valuable both for myself and for new insights for my clients.
The book highlighted a number of habits we have that inhibit finding happiness, satisfaction, and fulfillment in our lives. It demonstrated how we do things that are not good for us and don’t do the things that are. It covered what resistance is and how it manifests in our lives. And it talked about challenging times.
We all, at various points in our lives, experience difficult and painful circumstances. When we do, we have two choices. We can maintain a positive perspective even as we acknowledge the sadness; disappointment and sometimes heart wrenching pain. We can choose to learn, grow, and become a stronger person. We can be open to ways to help others who are having similar experiences.
Alternatively, we can drown in the sorrow. In truth, it’s easier to stay down. It’s a harder choice to climb out and find peace in the midst of the pain. But it is a choice.
At the time I was reading this particular book, I found myself struggling with my own thoughts and noticed myself to be emotionally in a deep and dark place. My first step was to turn inward in quiet reflection and to stay busy. We ended up with three cleaner rooms, a quiche in the fridge, and two stuffed pepper dinners to show for it.
My second step was gratitude. No matter what is happening, I have so much in life for which to be thankful.
As I noticed myself waking in the mornings with my mind engaged in a tug-o-war battle between pulling a pillow over my head to escape with more sleep or making the wiser choice to get up and get started, I learned to quietly reflect on two simple words, “Thank You.” I cultivated the habit of repeating these words until they took over; the tug-o-war was eliminated; and my feet were on the floor. I didn’t begin my days until I my trust and faith were restored.
When life is messy, disappointing, and sad, gratitude is at first a choice. It is only when you make the choice that the peace that comes with gratitude arrives.
Even amidst the pain.