You Want to Be Supportive But ….

I have a client who is a leader in her direct sales business.  She also feels stuck in her business growth.

As part of her coaching, she completed an Everything DiSC profile in order to understand how her behavior preferences and tendencies are impacting her in business. Her results demonstrate that she has a natural desire to be supportive of others and this brings great meaning and fulfillment to her. When someone is unhappy or distressed, it is important to her to show compassion and respect for where they are in life.  As a very people oriented individual, relationships come before tasks or agenda.

When someone on her team starts to take their training/coaching call down a path of complaining about her life, kids, spouse, (and etc!), the call gets sidetracked, and they don’t make progress on the intended purpose of their meeting.

My client’s desire to be supportive makes it challenging for her to re-direct the conversation and not have it cause her to feel ….. unsupportive.  By the end of the call, she feels drained, unproductive, and unvalued.  Because her natural tendency is to be supportive, she abandons business and turns to where she feels valued, e.g., taking care of family.

In his classic book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie teaches that the best way to get what you want is by giving other people what they want. When you take time to deeply listen to identify and understand what matters most to someone else, you can be supportive in providing that while not losing sight of what matters most to you.

My client knows she wants to make a difference in women’s lives.  Her clients have a variety of desires and when my client asks the questions needed to identify what those are, she is then able to redirect the conversation in valuable ways.

She can redirect it to be both supportive and productive.

 And everyone wins.